Apparently I have reached that awkward age where I am now being invited to baby birthday parties, sans a baby of my own. My co-worker invited me to her son’s first birthday… While part of me is so excited to attend because I love her and her son the kind of cute that immediately makes you ovulate, the other part of me felt old and once again behind the curve. While my co-workers and high school friends and aquaintences, who I see on a daily basis, are tying the knot and popping out babies…primarily in small towns. My college friends are creating quite the juxtaposition by being spread out in big cities all over Cali and are enjoying the single life while focusing on their career. While the ladder is always what I had envisioned for myself, and what I continue to strive for, my current surroundings are sure making it hard not to feel like maternal clock is already ticking.
Its like on the one hand, I see a cute baby and my overies immediately start aching, while my liver screams out “No, your 20’s are for fun and parties”….my liver wins again.
One moment I’m thinking omg I’m so old because half my friends are parents and the next I’m wildly offended because I’m not getting carded at Safeway buying wine. It’s like OMG! You don’t know me! People say I look young! Do I look that old? It’s not even questionable anymore?? Am I going to need Botox or anti-wrinkle cream at 30?? After that experience I’m definitely going to need that glass of wine. And to think I used to revel in not getting carded at the bars because the bouncers new me…not getting carded at Safeway does not evoke the same feelings.
I returned from a Palm Springs vacation with all my close college friends a week ago…I just now feel like I’ve recovered. Remember the days when we used to sit around a table and do shots, before we went to the bar to drink…and then we would get up and go to class the next day like functioning members of society? I have no idea how we did that. Nothing makes you feel older than needing a week to detox and recover from a weekend of partying. The fact that we made it through college shocks me. I’m so proud of who we used to be and so shocked at how we all struggle. And let me tell you a hang over at 21 is not the same hang over you get at 24. At 24 it’s much, much worse.
The curse of having little siblings is being mistake for their mom at a disturbingly young age. My brother was born when I was 16, holding him in public I feel like I could have inspired the MTV producers to create 16 and pregnant. Instead of correcting people I go with it. To this day when he is my sidekick running errands and people tell me my son is cute I just thank them and keep it moving, no need for hysterics and my brother thinks it’s hilarious. While that’s all well and good the receptionist at the European Wax Center who thought I was bringing in my sixteen year old sister for a “Mother, Daughter bikini wax” was just down right insulting. She’s only 5 years younger than me!! I’m still seriously hoping she needed her eyes checked! Now that made me feel old.
Despite the fact that society is making me feel pressured to become a baby factory now that I’m in my mid-twenties, until that day comes I’m going to continue to hang into my youth and enjoy mimosas by the pool, no screaming babies allowed.