Diamonds are a girls best friend and everyone thinks that’s what a girl wants to find under the tree. But believe me finding a calorie free bottle of wine in your stocking would be just as exciting. If saying these things out loud wouldn’t be totally mortifying we’d be lining up to sit on Santa’s lap but for now we will continue to snail mail our list to the North Pole.
1. Calorie free foods. There are a list of foods we would all love to eat (or drink) to our hearts content. Pasta, all things chocolate, wine and pizza. I would trade a diamond necklace for an endless supply of calorie (aka guilt free wine and pasta.) We would all
Be less “hangry” (anger caused by hunger) if we weren’t always calorie counting.
2. A hot bod. It would be great if Santa could send a little magic our way and turn these B’s into C’s with out a nip and a tuck. Or a flat stomach without hours of gym time or depriving ourselves of anything containing sugar. If only Santa.
3. A No Fade Tan. An everlasting summer glow would be amazing. No more freezing cold spray tans or sweating it out while lying in a tanning bed. Tanning is only fun when you’re laying on a beach or by the pool with a cocktail. No more expensive smelly lotions just a gorgeous glow!
4. A pair of gorgeous stiletto heels that don’t completely murder your feet. There is nothing more depressing than buying a beautiful new pair of heels that you wear once and then you’re plagued with blisters for weeks. Dear Santa, could you please leave a pair of pain free stilettos under the tree for me? Thanks.
5. They say money can’t buy happiness….but it sure can help! It doesn’t grow on trees but we all wish it did. I know nothing cheers me up like doing a little online shopping with a glass of wine after work. It would be great if Santa could plant one of those money trees in my back yard…insurance doesn’t cover retail therapy!
6. More good sex. Need I say more? Is that too much to ask? I will say I’m
Not sure how Santa could bring that down the chimney but a girl can dream right?
7. An extra day in the weekend. There should be an 8 day week. There needs to be a day between Saturday and Sunday! There is not enough time to get everything done and relax!! (Or we can have a four day work week and make Friday the beginning of the weekend) Can Santa call the president about this?
8. A pain free period. An entire week of bloating and cramps. Nobody likes it or wants it. If it’s gotta happen could Santa please alleviate some of the obnoxious symptoms that ruin our week? Until Santa can find a cure …more midol in our stocking please.
9. We truly wish we could ask Santa to add all our favorite shows to Netflix. What possible explanation could Netflix have for excluding The O.C. From it’s repertoire. Dear Santa I’ve been a very good girl! Please make Netflix add it…we need our Adam Brody fix!
10. For all the haters in your life too..poof…disappear! I mean who needs all that irritation anyway. Life’s too short… They can go ahead and exit yours …immediately! Santa these bitches need to immediately go on your naught list.
So next time you’re struggling to find a present for your girl try inventing calorie free wine…or pasta…or chocolate. She’s gonna love it!